Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.

Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Fear of spiders is called arachnophobia. Fear of tight spaces is called claustrophobia. Fear of Chuck Norris is called logic.